me: can we talk about riff raff for a second
Justin: yeah, we can try
me: he's like, definitely trolling us, right?
me: i mean, the pringles
Justin: Most anything with an aesthetic is essentially trolling
Justin: Seriously, Prince or Bowie or whatever would be "trolling" today because we can't believe anything ever
Justin: We're dumb as hell
Justin: Whoa, Maumee Bay has Yurt Rentals??
Justin: Total Number of Yurt Units: 1
Year of Installation: 1997
Ah, what have we here. A vintage '97 Yurt Unit. That is a good year. * inhales deep as fu
Occupancy per Yurt: 6 persons
Justin: What is the crime rate in this 6 person yurt? Are there good public schools? What is the WalkScore for my new yurt?
Justin: I'm hesitant to approve of anything for fear of accidentally giving one of your boyfriends props
me: ONE of them
Justin: got to keep my hater game tight
Justin: I swear, I had a dream last night that Mary-Louise Parker was your best friend and she told me all the things you hate about me. I got so mad that it woke me up.
Justin: She's just a really smug woman
Justin: The things she said didn't even make sense but her face is so obnoxious
OAKLAND'S UP-AND-COMING PUP PUP DISTRICT
Justin: The whole concept of cities with culturally unique neighborhoods intermingling from block to block still just makes life seem like a JRPG to me.
me: why japanese?
Justin: Because those are the kind that make me think of "Hello, HERO! Welcome to PUP PUP VILLAGE. Everyone here just loves dogs. See the DOG MASTER about getting a pet for yourself!" and then you walk to the next town and it's "Hello, HERO! Are you new here in STRONG TOWN? Fighters come from all over to TOGGLE THE ATTRIBUTES MENU." and such
me: NEVER READ THE COMMENTS
me: "As a taxpayer who recently stood behind several black people at a Kum & Go while they all purchased lots of junk food with their cards, I feel sick. There are no words to describe my frustration with those who encourage benevolence for those that lack initiative."
James: As a taxpayer who recently saw an Asian walking a dog, I am concerned that our animal control officers are not keeping animals out of the hands of fiendish coolies
me: oh my god
James: As a taxpayer who recently stood behind a woman buying tampons, I feel sick. There are no words to describe my horror at a woman who will avoid pregnancy long enough to experience a menstruation cycle, thereby killing an innocent christian life.
James: as a taxpayer who recently stood behind several gay people in line for a gloryhole, i feel sick. there are no words to describe my chagrin at a self-involved man who would assume that whatever's behind that gloryhole is another man.
1994 in black and white
barthel: Remember how in 1994 “everyone” hated Congress, and so then the Republicans came and did a revolution with their superior brains and hearts and this was just and so because “everyone” hated Congress? Funny thing about that. In 1994, only 29% of whites approved of Congress, it’s true. But for African-Americans, approval of Congress was a healthy 52% - the highest level it had been at...
tphd: WILD DOGS STOLE MY MOM BUT LATER SHE SENT ME A LETTER FROM THE WILD DOG KINGDOM IT SAID “DEAR SON, IM A WILD DOG NOW. I USED TO LOVE YOU, BUT NOW IM TOO BUSY WITH WILD DOG THINGS FOR LOVE. SEE YA, MOM.”
Just North of Something Important: Good lord, a... →
barthel: Good lord, a mixed-race person who is president of the United States just endorsed gay marriage several years after passing health care reform. Do you know how many of those things were inconceivable 5 years ago? You can be happy about this without having to be happy about everything else the man…
Here lies Justin. Felled Honorably on the Field of Battle by Howard &...– Justin