July 2009
MUNI costs two dollars now
June 2009
Play
Listen
“My Lovely Elizabeth” by S.E. Rogie from Palm Wine Guitar Music. via Waxidermy
A QUESTION
Does anyone know what happens when your San Francisco landlord fails to pay the water bill, and your water is shut off?
A SENSITIVE MAN
- Justin: Also, I am an emotionally unstable manchild of epic (see: large) proportions.
- Justin: So that's kinda my thing
- Justin: ...not like I cried or anything
- me: DID YOU!?!?
- me: I believe you became a bit lachrymose at Capote even
- Justin: I do almost everytime I see a movie in theatre
- Justin: I mean, unless the movie sucks and even then sometimes. I've cried watching movies that I openly dislike. Never Been Kissed, for instance?
- Justin: Openly dislike....secretly looooove
- Justin: Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
- Justin: The ORIGINAL!
- Justin: I cried during the middle of the day in my car listening to a Taylor Swift song just the other day even
- me: Oh my god, did you?
- me: I cried today watching a State Farm commercial
- Justin: HAAAAA
- Justin: You win AGAIN
- me: EVERYONE WAS HELPING EACH OTHER
TRANSATLANTIC EXCHANGE
- Betty: tim is like "We'll have bacon buddies for breakfast!"
- me: no!!
- Betty: which is a sandwich made of bacon, toast, and ketchup
- Betty: TERRIBLE
- me: EW!
- me: and it sounds so sad to eat your buddy!!!
- Betty: i know!
- Betty: and why would you put ketchup on bacon???
- Betty: or toast?????
- Betty: i have so many questions
“The guy had a shirt on that said “Happy Father’s Day to the BEST Papa in the West!” His children have slyly managed to question his paternal merit in a purely geographical sense. That’s a real kick in the ass.”
—justin
WORDS I LOOKED UP TODAY
• legerdemain: sleight of hand
• sedulity: diligence
• phlegmatic: sluggish
• imprecation: curse
• cosset: to treat as a pet
• obdurate: stubborn
• inimical: friendly
• panegyric: formal or elaborate praise
the antonyms kicked my ass
“
This font was made by scanning bizarre religious booklets & spiritual powder packets that I found in esoterica spiritual stores in Oaxaca, Mexico.
My favorite pamphlet was called ‘WHAT ARE THE TROLLS AND HOW DO THEY HELP US?’.
The original text and images were letterpressed, but they’ve been mimiographed and photocopied looks like thousands of times.
” —the read-me file in the font i used
“In the event of a BART strike, 511 recommends that you carpool, ride with another transit provider, or avoid traveling.”
—GREAT ADVICE. THANKS.
Play
“Did you use something called METH?”
—editor, asking whether we’ve run a crime story yet
This might be the first time my employer has figured out "Internet" →
mercurynews.com
and it’s not terrible!
Play
Play
value judgments
- me: did you like SF?
- little brother: i loved it
- me: more than nyc?
- little brother: yeah
- little brother: new york city smelled every where
- little brother: sf only smells in certain places
“Lotta people lookin’ for work. Girl at a drive thru looked at me sitting there in my Comfort Inn polo and asked “Is it hard to get in there?” I explained that the ‘97 Chevy Cavalier is deceptively roomy even for a man of my size and stature. Turns out she was talking about a job at the hotel. Still, I have no regrets.”
—Justin
Play
