February 2008
William F. Buckley's Greatest Hits →
“Roscoe” - Midlake
“It’s like how we had a national government but that was too hard so we...”
– my high school chemistry teacher
5 Books That Can Actually Make You Stupider →
“Despite some rumors, the Ku Klux Klan is not endorsing Barack Obama for...”
– the KKK
cool shit i swept in front of my house today
• 2 cigarette butts
• mythic pizza flyer
• brake dirt from thousands of cars
• reflector from a bike
• torn-up parking ticket
• AAA battery, broken into 3 pieces
• stub of a joint
• a dime, tails up
• someone’s EBT card
• a worm
“Man, Oldies 93.5 played Fleetwood Mac’s Dreams, CCR’s Green River...”
– jw
this video makes me love hillary a little →
“He hides the exposed wood.”
– “How It’s Made” narration which made me laugh way too hard :(
z: naw i decided to go with tuna malt
z: malt
z: melt
z: fuck
z: tuna malt sounds so bad
"You're free to pray or not to pray for Huckabee. ... →
http://www.telestereo.com/Archivos/video.html →
Watch
“GWM going on diet to give away to any needy , great food - m4m - 49 (sebastopol)...”
– Craigslist personals
Banners I made with Library of Congress photos →
“Please provide the date of your death.”
– IRS letter (via littlebitosunshine)
little brother: ugh
brother: i got a freaking detention
me: whoa! why?
brother: my cellphone called dakota on speakerphone in the middle of reading
me: HAHA
me: did he answer?
brother: no, thankfully
brother: i was laughing cause at first i thought it was justins phone
brother: then i heard dakotas voice
brother: so thats a load
brother: im writing an apology to mr. taylor
brother: playing the tiny tim card
brother: the extremely kind and intelligent cripple
me: you're crippled?
brother: my foot, im on crutches
me: just like tiny tim
me: so do you think the apology will get you out of detention
brother: i hope so
brother: and in the email i put in that i wasnt pleading my case to get out of detention
brother: i hope that helps
“Studies link being born to dying.”
– coworker
jw (who works in a hotel): I had a congregation in the meeting room the other day
me: oh yeah?
jw: Yeah, I didn't know what to expect. I'd never had them before.
jw: It was so LOUD
jw: They brought in like speakers and a mic and like a lazer light show and shit.
jw: Like...the meeting room is not even that big. There is no way on God's green earth you need a mic
jw: I don't know why they would think they could be that loud. So much stomping and clapping and singing and SCREAMING about Jesus
jw: And some guy who's room was right above them called down so pissed saying he was going to call the cops because they couldn't even hear the tv
jw: So I went and told them to keep it down because we had gotten a complaint from "the man upstairs."
me: you did not say that
me: oh my gdddd
jw: Yup.
Conway Twitty - “You’ve Never Been...
ig: hi miranda
me: hi ig
me: is your day better?
ig: i decided to base my self-esteem on my scores on okcupid "would i date you" tests
...
me: ok this is making me sad now too
ig: this is making me wish i was DEAD
me: i already wish i was dead
me: i didn't have to take any tests
ig: oh no fair
ig: i already wished it too
me: you can have it
me: you called it
Bill Clinton's Red Face of Courage →
“It’s a lot easier to reject someone when you don’t have to reject...”
– Coworker
“‘Your smile lights up the room.’ (Only use this one if she has a...”
– purported guide to pickup lines that really work!
z: http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/9526/tigerzg9.jpg
me: what is that
z: a sabre tooth tiger DUH
z: i drew it with my own blood and a little urine oops
me: uh
Watchlol weed
WatchYodeling is hilarious but it’s also kind of impressive.
Watchthe good old days
http://barackobamaisyournewbicycle.com/ →
Also, it’s sung by Phil Collins in a Mexican... →
me: also i started wearing this hat
me: and jake hates it, so he stated wearing a hat too
bw: That's cute.
me: oh, yeah
me: i guess that's not interesting
bw: No, it is.
